Discursive Musings

What I Learned This Week

Don’t walk in the street.

Don’t think if you do everything, everything will be done.

Don’t slow down.

Don’t stop.

Don’t pour your own.

Don’t drink the whole bottle.

Don’t turn down a champagne brunch.

Don’t bring your phone.

Don't assume the position of navigator nor parking attendant.

Don’t get offended.

Don’t sing along.

Don’t guess at someone’s age.

Don’t ask the odd looking guy hitting on you if he is Robert Smith of The Cure.  He very well may be, and you will just end up looking silly.

Don’t take off your shirt.

And again, Don’t forget the damn bra.

What I Learned This Week

1. It is silly to try to beat me at a game I invented.
2. Apparently there is no flaw cash cannot fix.
3. Given an attractive enough reason, I can make it up that hill.
4. Cross-training cardio workouts can work up a sweat.
5. Think three times before hitting that send button.
6. When the moon is full go home early.
7. I want a five year old little boy.  That or a puppy.
8. All of my delightful quirks are inherited. (“What?”)

9. Holiday!  Celebrate!  God, it feels good to be back.

10. Remember to pack a bra.

Charm Me.

Nickname me.

Go out drinking with me in Concord.  Help me to find it.

Give me directions for the twenty-thousandth time.

Order another pitcher even though we are all already drunk.

Drop in on our hood hangout ‘just by chance.’

Let me fall asleep on your couch.

Let me hog your bed.

Let me think I am steering.

Want the surrey with the fringe on top.

Get a little too excited about being my partner.

Get your daughter excited to hear my stories.

Be ok with me not wanting to talk about it.

Be ok with me doing nothing but talking.

Send me pictures of your new baby.

Send me pictures of your pregnant belly.

Send me pictures of NGOTB.

Hug me when I need a good cry.

Don’t let my dorkiness embarrass you.

Jump in the ocean with all your clothes on.

Cheer me on the whole way.

Tell me I look hot.

Tell me you love me.

What I Learned This Week

1. Anomaly of passing for a co-ed all weekend probably has more to do with location than laugh lines.

2. Trust your instincts regarding black duffel bags.

3. Me and Jen should be the two additions for Oceans 14.

4. Standing on my head decreases my alcohol tolerance.  Damn yoga.

5. Confrontations are better over mocha's.

6. I am handy with a screwdriver.

7. Don't take on the neuroses of your friends.

8. I didn't know I could run that far!

9. Being unable to mend the broken hearts of people you love is painful.

10. Don't be content with an ordinary world.

11. EBFPS is a swell idea.

12. Seven siblings requires an assistant.

13. Some things happen that make me speechless. ...Trusting that not everything needs to be understood, deconstructed, or resolved in the moment is progress for me.

I feel ya girlfriend

What I Learned This Week

1. Initial interpretations are often not reliable.

2. Seeing what you came for is not necessarily the objective.

3. Off The Market is the new Unavailable.

4. A dear friend and wine - things that get better with time.

5. Freebies are flattering.

6. Porches are made for rocking.  Lines are made to be waited in.  Beds are meant for napping.

7. We all just Play It As It Lays.

8. Someone Is Waiting For Me Somewhere.

9. It is because I have a vagina.

10. Good friends understand.